A Very Personal Struggle

All my life I have always been a proud man. That pride never allowed me to confide my personal life with anyone; not even people that were close to me. No one around me ever knew when I was struggling financially, mentally or any other way. If someone asked me how I was doing I always responded that I was doing great. It was partly because most of the time no one really cares how you’re doing and also because I was too pride to reveal the truth. I always faced my struggles by myself refusing to let anyone in. It was only recently that I began sharing with everyone my life story. That only happened when I realized that the things I had been through could help someone else. Revealing my struggle with Bi-polar disorder and homelessness was the best decision I ever made. It not only helped others it helped me to heal. Eventually you will be able to hear about my whole life in a book that is being written about me. I have been truly blessed.

The reason I am sharing this with you is because the time has come for me to share another personal struggle with you. It is a struggle that many Americans deal with everyday. As you know I am a small business owner. I able to be in business thanks to the generosity of the city of Lorain. So many people are under the impression that if you own a business you must have a lot of money. Let me assure you that nothing could be farther from the truth. My income falls well below the national poverty line. Don’t get me wrong I am able to survive, because I have learned through life experiences how to do so.

The one thing I cannot afford is health insurance. During the health care debate I stood by silently while people said things like, “Obama’s health care plan is nothing more than welfare,” or “It’s only lazy people that will benefit from the health care reform.” I have worked hard all my life and most of the time I had insurance. Now that I am in business for myself I work harder than I have ever worked in my life and I can’t afford to buy health insurance, and I don’t meet any of the guidelines to receive Medicade.

What brought this to the surface was my trip to the Emergency room today. I am suffering with something that may or may not be life threatening. Actually I am suffering with two things. I have had high blood pressure for several years and have been able to control it with medication. I went to the ER with and unknown problem involving my prostate. For the past few days it has caused me debilitating pain. I finally couldn’t take it anymore so I went to the ER. I went to the ER because I couldn’t afford to go to my own Doctor. The experience was much different from the experience I had when I had insurance.

I was living in the state of Arizona when I was finally diagnosed with Bi-Polar disorder. I had a very good job that included health insurance. When I knew that I had a problem I just called my insurance company and they found me the best Specialist in the state to treat me. I went to the ER and they processed me right in and put me in touch with everyone I needed to help me; including an inpatient facility that was very well equipped to handle my problem. I spent nearly a month there getting my life back in order and learning to live again. My life was most certainly saved. The tragedy was that when I was in the hospital my job was eliminated. I only had insurance for another month and then I was without insurance. From that moment on I was denied access to all the services that saved my life. I was once again on my own.

Today when I checked into the ER I had no insurance and I was put in a room by myself. I was there for quite some time before I even saw a Doctor and I never saw a nurse until they checked me out. He told me he didn’t know what was wrong with me and referred me to a urologist. The doctor told me it was very important that I go see the urologist because it could be very serious. Which brings me back to my original problem; if I could afford a Doctor’s office visit I would have went there to begin with. It seems my only option is to wait until the new health care bill goes into effect.

I wonder how many people are just like me who have illnesses they can do nothing about because they simply can’t afford it. I am sure the number is astronomical. I wonder what all the people who are so opposed to this new health care plan would say to all those people. People like me.